Beauty

When I was younger (and single-r) I would hear people discuss their "types". I don't believe in the concept of the "type" since, historically, I have been attracted to lots of different people who have lots of different appearances, styles, gender identities, you name it. But there might be something to be said for an inclination. I was inclined to date artists, you see? Artists are shiny. Artists are smart and freeing. So, maybe I'll glom onto that for this argument.

As an older (and married-er) adult, I think a lot about taste as it pertains to music, decor, fashion, and culinary taste. Again, I like Indian food, but I eat all kinds of food, not just Indian food. Buuuuut on a day off, I might be more inclined to choose Indian food, over, say, American Gastropub fare. 

The same goes for my aesthetic preferences. The more I let myself be "me", the more I surprise myself. I like to wear all blacks or neutrals. My wedding dress was navy blue. I prefer eccentric eye makeup, with liners in blues, purples, and greens. I only buy organic beauty products, even if it costs twice the price of a grocery store staple. I will choose a bottle of liquor based on whether it is streamlined and pleasing to the eye (Jameson is exempt. Old habits die hard. Also, I'm currently too broke to justify purchasing Aviation Gin and Crème de Violette. There is always an exception to the rule.) And, much to my horror as of late, I've realized that I really like nice jewelry. Not the classic stuff like gold and diamonds, but weird, contemporary art pieces.

My mom bought me wild navy and gold Swarovski crystal earrings for my wedding day. They touched my shoulders as they spun around and around, little cubes stacked upon one another. My favorite rings are large and tacky; they dominate my small hands and fingers like a disco ball at a kitchen table. One of my favorite Pixar characters is Edna Mode. She dresses simply but loves eccentric things. I'm trying to quit fighting it. I also love her because she's short and objectively unsexy, just like me. I let my lack of physical confidence determine how I'd dress and accessorize for awhile. After this year, no mas. Remember that saying about beauty being in the eye of the beholder? So yeah, I retract my statement about sexiness. 

Yesterday, I slapped on two masks and went down to Chicago's Museum of Contemporary Art. I love museums, and I've missed them so much. I spent about 2.5 hours there, and could have stayed longer if my feet didn't hurt so damn much. There was a wonderful exhibit featuring the works of artists of color and their reflections on the pandemic ("The Long Dream"), a room showcasing a Puerto-Rican artist who uses a mix of acrylics and oils, as well as builds his own instruments (Omar Velázquez), Carolina Caycedo (whose work connects ecology, native culture, and language) and Christina Quarles. Quarles' work particularly stunned me. She's like Picasso, if Picasso used more interesting gestures and colors, and perhaps, touched on more intimate human interactions. (Sorry, Pablo.) 

With my mind humming with a chorus of a thousand fire ants, I made my way through the gift shop doors, as they so cleverly direct you to do, and was determined not to buy anything. But then I thought, I'll look at the clearance jewelry. Or maybe all of the voices of generations of women on my mom's side of the family said that. Who knows?

I saw a beautiful necklace at a staggeringly low price. I stared at it for about ten minutes, not bothering to look at anything else. It was glass with rose petals encased within. I decided I could afford it, and as the teller was packing it up, I saw the original price tag, written at nearly ten times the price I was purchasing at. Now, if that isn't synchronicity, I don't know what is. It was too beautiful for me to pass up. We belonged together.  

So maybe we should lean into the things we find beautiful. Love interests, weird scarfs, remote vacation destinations. They might present themselves to us quietly, discreetly, and affordably.

What are your guilty inclinations that you plan on leaning into? Your artistic preferences? The lovely things you must keep around you at all times? I'm curious. 

Until tomorrow, stay well, stay safe, and stay kind.

Love,
​c